As some of you know, I have on a journey to become healthier and more fit after a long year of making poor eating choices. In reality, it’s been a lifetime of making poor choices, just saying.
Today, #Noom had me do an assignment related to “writing my story”. One would think this would be right up my alley, however, I found it more difficult than one would expect. I had to publicly become vulnerable, which I think is hard for many of us.
Noom had the story assignment broken up in three parts- below is what I wrote today, and I hope my truth resonates with all of you as you read it.
“While dealing with the rapture of Covid at my facility I work at, I made food choices that were convenient instead of healthy and became significantly obese. I became ashamed at myself and couldn’t even look in the mirror.
My long distance partner lives three hours away, my coworkers and care team I manage, and my housemates friends have all become supportive of my decision to become healthy. They are positive cheerleaders right now. I am my own worse critic however. I have allowed my own thoughts get the better of me and fooled myself into thinking what I believe others thinks of me. Unfortunately, I did received some criticism about my journey to promote healthy living and help inspire others. They said, “you are a joke”, or “you are not accomplish your goals”. I had to return back to a quote I used to live by, “other’s people perception of me is none of my business”. This quote comes from Author and motivator, Lisa Nichols.
It’s not the fear of failing that hinders me, it’s the fear of success. I find myself trapped in a world that comes from the negative voices from my past. The ones that said, “you can never make a difference”, “you will never become a writer”, or “you will never become an innovator and motivator”. I believed these voices for a very long time. Even though I have two poetry anthologies published, even though I run a healthcare program that many said could not be achieved that specializes in long term care behavioral memory care, and even though I have survived so many things in my life, I still await the past to drop a hammer on all that I have achieved. Even though I am now 248lbs from 307lbs, I still have the fear of “what will happen when I get to my goal weight and fitness goals? In reality, I have a great support system. In reality, I have forgiven the people from my past who abused or verbally scarred me. This is about the scares themselves and not the control others had on me at one time. It’s about not being afraid to publicly and privately celebrate the accomplishments and embracing my strength that has always been there to not fear, but embrace the positives.”
Reflection: Some people may wonder why there is not a conclusion to this message. That’s because my story is still moving forward. My story does not end just because one chapter has ended as another begins. For you see, life is a revolving door and although there are some who try to close the door on you, keep walking through that doorway . My journey to health and well-being does not end with me reaching my goals. It ends with all of us by continuing the the stories we jointly hold in our hearts, minds, and souls.
#noom #gratitide #healthandwellness
Thank you for coming by today! Will see you soon!